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What I Learned In a Vilnius Gay Club

As we had to stick to our plan, we had to squeeze as much out of our weekend as it was possible.

The morning was spent on the Tauro Hill amidst coin grandads.

(Actually not only me, but K., too, adores flea markets.)

The next few hours were dedicated to finding a coat for K. and a new backpack for me.

Everything we had to that moment was totally worn out.

And shabby to shame.

Of course, a set of meat zepellins (not for me, sure), curds doughnuts and baltic carrots with peas followed.

We could hardly move afterwards.

The opening concert with Gubaidulina’s “Das Gastmahl während der Pest” (“Feast During the Plague”) was of a revealing shake-up.

We went to the same basement cafe after the concert. “Balti Drambliai” — highly recommended.

—So. Are we off to check out that Soho club in Švitrigailos street?


“Wow, what’s that?”

The club’s basement entrance was hidden by higher balustrades.

In a building like a 5-storey krushchevka.

This was exactly how a Kaluga gay club would look like.

If the region suddenly became independent and an EU-member later.

We enter.

It is quite empty.

We start in English.

—What is the entrance price?

—Ten litas per person, — answers a blonde Lithuanian sweet cutie.

K. peeps into the hall and says in Russian:

—Пусто как-то. Никого, кроме милого барменчика. (Somewhat empty, no one except for a lovely barman.)

We suddenly hear the cute Lithuanian boy’s voice behind us:

—Вы просто рано пришли. Всё начинается где-то в два ночи. (You are a bit early. Usually everything starts around two in the morning.)

Not a whiff of an accent.

We are startled.

—Молодёжь в Вильнюсе всё же говорит по-русски? (Youngsters do speak Russian in Vilnius?)

The boy is smiling.

—В Вильнюсе все говорят по-русски. Даже те, кто не говорит. (Everyone in Vilnius speaks Russian. Even those who don’t.)

25 October 2014. – Vilnius (Lithuania)